Worm Sex

Worm SexAnd now for something entirely different.

Under the snow moon, in the predawn chill, two lovers stretch naked in the clover, clinging to each other so tightly that they seem not two, but one strange creature, a beast with—dare I say—two backs?

And like a total perv, I ran and got my camera to document this romantic moment. And texted the pictures to my husband at work. Ha!

Then I called my dogs to come inside, and Rowan inadvertently stepped on the two in flagrante, and they sprung apart like two halves of a snapped rubber band. It was AMAZING. And I felt really bad that my dog stepped on them. Is it weird that I spent all day (when I wasn’t laughing) feeling guilty about it?

WORM SEX! Holy crap, I didn’t even know worms had sex. I mean, I guess, of course they do, but you know, I never thought about it. Until today. Today I’ve been thinking about it obsessively and cracking up at random intervals.

My pal Jenn shared this article with me, and I now know more about worm sex than I ever knew there was to know. I challenge anyone to read this without uttering a Beavis-like titter: “When the worm knows a potential mate is nearby he will start to search in the area with the tip of his body until he runs into the other worm.” Heh. Heh heh. Heh.

And of course, I feel even more guilty about the coitus interruptus because, as I now know from the above-linked article, the poor things can only mate during the early spring and late fall, and it takes two to three hours to do it! Dude. Sorry, guys.

So there you have it. I hope that your horizons have been widened as mine have been by this wonder of nature. Cue music: “It’s the circle of life…” 🙂

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  1. The fact that you’ve been cracking up all day cracks ME up. I laughed and laughed at my first response to you when you asked what was happening: “well, when a mommy worm and a daddy worm love each other very much…”.

    And now I’m feeling quite immature but impish for realizing that worm rhymes with sperm. Tee hee.

    Yes, it’s been a long day.

    • I KNOW!!! Right?!? I think someone needs to write a children’s book about it: “When a Daddy Worm Loves a Mommy Worm…”

      And now I’m going to be singing that in my head all day, to the tune of “When a Man Loves a Woman.” 🙂


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